blessings

tomorrow's my last day at tp and well, i don't exactly know how to feel...

partly relieved since its been crazy chaotic with all the marking going on. that and also the certain aspects of the job which can be just ridiculous and loaded with unnecessary stress. i've done my job and my students did, well... reasonable i suppose. i think the disappointment wasn't just felt by myself but across the board, so i can leave with a clear conscience.

the other part feels apprehensive since all this while i could choose not to deal with the fact that uni was approaching and so i have to deal with starting anew all over again. but i know eventually its something that i just have to do, as much as i would rather not. i can't stagnate if i want to grow.

there's also a part that just wants to know what's going to happen. if things were merely transitory or maybe the two of us can work something out. after thinking things over i've just decided that it is whatever it is and if its friendship then so be it. i don't wanna waste emotions turning it over and over. i have faith that if its right, i'll know...

i'll try to make tomorrow as good as it can get...